An insecure person is someone who is not confident about himself and keeps doubting himself. It may not sound much, but if you are in a relationship with an insecure person, then you might find it really hard to not be sad or depressed. Such a relationship is a toxic one and it’s best if you come out of it.
However, there are a lot of insecure men out there and they can mask their insecurity well. So, if you are with a man, then look out for these signs which are an indication of some form of insecurity
1. He has no outside friends or interests.
He never mentions any friends and doesn’t hang out with anyone but you. Outside of work, he has no interests or hobbies. He doesn’t go to the gym, play any sports, take any classes, volunteer, or go to church. When he isn’t with you, he’s sitting at home thinking about you. Or maybe he did have friends and hobbies at one time, but he gave them all up in order to spend every minute with you.
2. Asking About Your Ex
Since they have no self-belief, they are always thinking about your ex as well. They will ask about your ex again and again and try to determine if you have really gotten over them. Their insecurity will be at an all-time high. He won’t be able to see any reason when you are talking about your ex and telling you have left them in the past.
3. He tells you he loves you right away.
Very early in the relationship, he professes his undying love for you. Part of you feels like Rudolph when Clarice tells him he’s cute. You could fly through the air while shouting, “He loves me! He loves me! He loves MEEEEEE!” But the sane part of you feels like, He loves me? Wait what? This is our SECOND DATE! That’s crazy-talk!
It takes time to get to know someone enough to love them and if your new boyfriend is telling you he loves you right off the bat, it should sound warning bells, especially if he pressures you into saying it back to him.
4. You Are Everything
When both of you are in love, your lover repeatedly mentions that his world circles around yours. It might seem romantic but it’s a huge responsibility. If anything happens down the road, his world will fall apart. And that is something that will really break him. Complete dependence is closer to obsession and that is not healthy.
5. Jealousy
They don’t really like it when you spend time with your friends. They don’t want you to go out to shop with your girlfriends and if you happen to have a good friendship with any man, then he’s going to completely lose his mind. While at first this possessiveness may feel like protectiveness, it might upset your friends and put you in a bad mood too.
6. He plays the break-up game.
He plays this sort of game wherein he threatens to leave or break up with you. He says things like, “I don’t feel wanted” or “I don’t think you really love me.” He doesn’t really want to end the relationship; he’s hoping you’ll beg him to stay. If you do, it validates his fragile ego. If you don’t beg him to stay, he’ll take it all back and do whatever he can so that he doesn’t lose you.
He’s just testing your devotion to him and demanding that validation he so craves. Eventually, however, you’ll either be stuck in this unhealthy relationship or you’ll tire of this little game and gladly let him leave the next time he threatens it.
7. Checking Your Phone
As a way to keep tabs on you, he may start checking your phone. When you are texting someone, he would look from behind and check what you are messaging. If you are on the computer, then he will be lingering on the back and watching you as you prepare emails.
8. He thinks you’re ᴄʜᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ.
He can’t quite shake his suspicions that you’re ᴄʜᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ on him. He may accuse you of flirting with the waiter, having an ᴀғғᴀɪʀ with a coworker, or just looking around for someone better. It isn’t necessarily that he doesn’t trust you. It’s more a problem of him feeling like he’s not good enough for you so it’s just a matter of time until you find someone better.
