If You Want To Fall Back In Love With Your Long-Term Partner, Do These Things
It is perfectly normal to have moments when you feel more or less in love with your partner. However, it’s painful to have lulls in a relationship that leave you feeling hopeless or questioning their future. If you’re worried that you won’t feel the same way about your longtime love, here’s what you can try.
1. Talk about it
Communication is the most vital aspect of any relationship. Sit down together and talk to your partner, openly and honestly, about what’s going on with them. Share your thoughts on personal feelings, career issues, childcare, lifestyle, and find common ground that you both agree on. Just talk and many difficulties can be alleviated or avoided.
2. Treat your partner with kindness.
Kindness is really the key to staying in love. Acting with more love makes you feel more in love. It softens your partner, even in hot moments. Continuing to show love and generosity pays big dividends and leads to millions of rewards. You feel good about yourself and it makes your partner feel closer to you.
3. Enjoy what you love about your partner.
Think about what you like and appreciate about your partner. What qualities do you admire or enjoy about them? If you like that he or she is adventurous, continue to share new activities. If you like his sense of humor, be playful in your communication. If you like that he’s warm and loving, make sure you connect with him every day, rather than being distracted by other things.
4. Ask yourself what they need.
Sometimes when you feel disconnected from your partner, the problem is not a lack of passion, but rather a presence of resentment. This resentment comes from you feeling victimized and him/her feeling guilty. So take a minute to assess what they are going through and what their particular needs are (in the moment and in general). Are they hungry? Are they exhausted? Do they need to be held?
5. Remind yourself why you fell in love with this person in the first place.
After being with someone for a while, their little habits and quirks that you once found endearing can suddenly become incredibly annoying. Try to remember when you used to find your partner attractive. Review messages and letters to rekindle the original feelings. Remember the giddiness you felt back then. Try to bring back those romantic memories you both experienced.
6. Appreciate the positives
Sure, there are many things about your partner that sometimes irritate you, but what about all the amazing things they do? Grab a pen and paper and write down everything you think your partner has done for you but that you’ve taken for granted. Return the favor by acknowledging and appreciating him/her. Assure him/her that he/she never went unnoticed.
7. Put aside your expectations and discontent
It is important to know that people make mistakes and you should be prepared to forgive them. If you start to overlook small resentments, you will be able to focus on more important issues in the relationship.
8. Share your goals and try to achieve them together
Discuss the possibilities of a joint project you can both undertake and make a plan to carry it out.
It could be a trip or learning a sport. Or from planning a house to renovating the one you already have. Either way, make it an interesting activity that engages both of you.
Projects like this can reintroduce the spark back into a relationship that was starting to feel like a sibling relationship.
The most important thing to remember is that this is the person you fell in love with and who stood by you against all odds. And this is the person you had the best time with.