This Man Lost His Job Due To Downsizing. But Never Expected This From His Wife. On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter. In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.
This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.
Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state. During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been let go.
It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he’d be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he’d been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined. Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totaling nearly $1 million.
Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank which was worth over $2 million, and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank. She explained that for more than three decades she had ‘charged’ him for s*x, these holdings had multiplied and these were the results of her savings and investments.
Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out, ‘If I’d had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business! ‘That’s when she shot him!. You know, sometimes, men just don’t know when to keep their mouths shut.
A couple of elderly men were venting their frustrations about the woes of modern technology.
“I just can’t ever seem to remember my darn passwords,” grumbled one of them.
The other one smiled. “Oh really? I can never forget mine!”
“How do you manage it?” asked the first guy curiously.
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“Well, I simply set all my passwords to ‘Incorrect’ so that whenever I’m told that my password is incorrect, I’ll remember it!”
A blonde once got lost near a river.
A dumb blonde is walking along, lost, and encounters a deep and wide river.
She looks up and down the river for a way across but is unsuccessful in finding one.
Yet, when looking to the other side again, she happened to see another blonde on the opposite river bank. She tried calling her.
“How can I get to the other side of the river?” she shouts loudly.
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The other blonde replied “What for? You are already on the other side of the river!”
