An old woman walks into a tattoo shop, looks directly at the artist and says “I want to get a tattoo”.
The artist hesitantly replies “Well, ok where would you like this tattoo? Old lady: “actually I want two, one on the inside of my left thigh and one and the inside of my right thigh”
Artist: “you know how much this will hurt? Are you really sure you want them there?”
Old lady barks at him: “of course I know that’s where I want them! I don’t care how much it will hurt!” Artist: “okay, whatever you want then. Let’s take a look at art the art book to see if there is something you want.”
Old lady: “I already know what I want. I want a Christmas tree on my left thigh, and a turkey on my right thigh” Artist: “uhhhh ok, I will do that, but could you answer me as to why you would want such a thing?”
Old lady: “Because in sick of my husband complaining there is nothing to eat between Christmas and Thanksgiving!”
Little Johnny went to the mall and rushed to a toy shop to pick up a toy plane. He gave the shopkeeper Monopoly money and then started to leave.
The shopkeeper told him,
“Excuse me, little boy, this isn’t real money.”
Little Johnny continued walking out of the shop without any reply.
The shopkeeper repeated himself, and Little Johnny kept walking.
The third time the shopkeeper called him, and Johnny said “What?”
The shopkeeper said,
“I’m sorry, young man, but this is not real money.”
Little Johnny looked at the plane in his hands, looked at the shopkeeper and finally said,
” And this isn’t a real plane.”
