This Woman Couldn’t Take Her Eyes Off This Handsome Man. But Then He Said This. A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying an after-work cocktail with her girlfriends …. when an exceptionally tall, handsome, extremely sexy middle-aged man entered. He was so striking that the woman could not take her eyes off him.
The young-at-heart man noticed her overly attentive stare, and walked directly toward her. (As all men will.) Before she could offer her apologies for so rudely staring, he leaned over and whispered to her, “I’ll do anything, absolutely anything that you want me to do, no matter how kinky, for $20.00……on one condition. “Flabbergasted, the woman asked what the condition was. Flabbergasted, the woman asked what the condition was. The man replied, “You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words. “The woman considered his proposition for a moment, then slowly removed a $20 bill from her purse, which she pressed into the man’s hand along with her address. She looked deeply into his eyes, and slowly, and meaningfully said…. “Clean my house.
In some religions, you talk to the priest when you do something wrong. Depending upon what you did and how many times you did it, they may tell you to say specific prayers, or perhaps they may give you some type of punishment that will supposedly pay for what you did.
This is a situation that many people find themselves in when they are part of that religion, but not all of them pay as close attention to it. In some cases, they may even find a way to win, even in a system that is designed to make them lose. That is why you will like the following joke.
A teenage boy goes to church to confess his sins.
“Forgive me, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.”
The priest asks, “Is that you, little Joey Pagano?”
“‘Yes, Father, it is.”
“And who was the girl you were with?”
“I can’t tell you, Father. I don’t want to ruin her reputation.”
“Well, Joey, I’m sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?”
“I cannot say.”
“Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?”
“I’ll never tell.”
“Was it Nina Capelli?”
“I’m sorry, but I cannot name her.”
“Was it Cathy Piriano?”
“My lips are sealed.”
“Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?”
“Please, I cannot tell you.”
The priest sighs in frustration. “You’re very tight-lipped, and I admire that. But you’ve sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for four months. Now you go and behave yourself.”
Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers, “What’d you get?”
“Four months vacation and five good leads!”